Apparently Sarah Connor’s devilish charm and ripped biceps aren’t enough to prevent the Terminator show’s own judgment day.
Fox will be saying "Hasta la vista, baby" to Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles if the series’ ratings don’t find salvation. Every subsequent season-two episode has seen a drop in viewership, and it’s unlikely Chronicles will be back for a third round if the decline persists, an SCC insider told Entertainment Weekly.
Wait
a minute — a sci-fi TV series set in 2008 involving robots trying to
destroy the world? What better opportunity to toss in some of the
hottest new gadgets to revitalize viewer interest? Oddly enough, the
Connors thus far have been using mostly analog gear — screwdrivers,
shot guns and cleavage — to infiltrate Skynet. Why not treat
themselves with some retail/warfare therapy? Surely, the Connors have
to carry some disposable income if they’re running to-and-fro with wads of benjis stuffed in their jeans.
Here’s a list of some juicy new gadgets we’d like to see appear on the show.
Wasp Knife
Who can resist the Wasp Knife
? Designed for divers, the stainless steel knife contains a gas
canister in the handle, which injects a "freezing cold ball of
compressed gas, approximately the size of a basketball" when you stab a
victim. Remember how in Terminator 2, Arnie needed to crash a
truckload of liquid nitrogen on top of the T-1000 just to freeze him?
The Wasp Knife would produce the same effect, albeit smaller. Multiple
stabs should send Shirley Manson back to her frozen career as a
has-been rock star singing about the rain and being complicated.
Taser Shockwave
The
Connors don’t just have Manson, the liquid metal fembot, to worry
about. There’s a T-888 after the Connors, too, and John’s guardian, Cameron, is a
T-model-unknown hottie who’s been prone to robo-emotional malfunction. The
TASER Shockwave should fend off these metallic death knights. This big, bad mofo
shoots six inch-long probes emitting 50,000 volts of electricity. TASER
designed the Shockwave to paralyze crowds, meaning it should be enough
to put a T-888 out of commission just for long enough to scoop out its silicon
brains. The Shockwave’s been a highly controversial device, but since when did controversy hurt a show’s ratings?
Gypsy Belt
Sarah Connor is a MILF you don’t want to mess with, and the Gypsy Belt
should provide her extra protection without damaging her fashion cred.
The Gypsy Belt set consists of a leather belt and a cast zinc buckle
that doubles as a blade. Imagine what a great scene this would make,
where Sarah gets to demonstrate her skills in seduction and knifeplay at the same time. Hawt.
Samsung X360
Being
humanity’s last hope, Johnny is constantly on the run from those
malicious Terminators out to squash him. But he isn’t destined to lead
the human resistance against the Terminators simply because he’s a good
runner; he’s supposedly a gifted hacker, too, who has the power to
reprogram Terminators to be "good." Thus, he needs a highly capable,
lightweight laptop. Not a netbook, mind you: We can barely even type essays on those puny things. Not a
MacBook Air, either: If games aren’t Mac-compatible, what makes you
think Terminators are? Samsung’s upcoming X360
is the best option. Weighing in at 2.8 pounds, it’s actually a wee bit
lighter than the MacBook Air, and it runs Windows on the new Intel
Centrino 2 platform. The 13.3-inch screen should be enough for John to
get his bizniz done. Plus, the 120GB solid state drive is less prone to
damage since there are no moving parts — which could help John’s
precious data survive a nasty car crash. Because you know how much the
Connors love getting in car accidents.
GPS Snitch
Surprisingly,
the Connors seem to give their "guardian" bot Cameron quite a bit of
freedom to roam around despite her ability to kill anything that
crosses her path. The GPS Snitch,
which combines cellular and GPS technologies, alerts owners via text
message when their vehicles have moved beyond a set perimeter; a
precise location of the device can be tracked online in real time. This
would make a pretty good scene in an episode: John removes Cameron’s
"brain" chip to conduct some "surgery" on her. And being the computer
genius he is, John tears off the enclosure of the Snitch and figures
out a way to cram it inside Cameron and hook it up to her
self-generating battery. No more runaway robots for Johnny! He could
also use the Snitch in the future when the two have a robo-human love
affair and he suspects she’s cheating on him.
Got any more gadget suggestions? Feel free to submit some ideas and pictures you’d like to see in Chronicles in the reddit widget below.
See also:
- What Can Save The Sarah Connor Chronicles?
- More Futuristic Freedom Fighters for Sarah Connor Chronicles
- Shirley Manson Nails Creepy as Sarah Connor’s New CEO From Hell
- Sarah Connor Creator Talks Killer Bots, Cyborg Sex, Surviving the Future
- Fox to Stream Sarah Connor, Fringe for College Crowd
- Terminator Talent Talks Up New Sarah Connor Season
Posted under Gadget Reviews
The Sci-Fi references continue: The exoskeleton is named HAL, or Hybrid Assistive Limb, and is controlled by thought. The suit is strapped to the waist and legs and sensors monitor electrical signals sent to the legs from the brain. Just as we don’t have to consciously think about taking a step, Evan didn’t have to consciously control the HAL. It just works. “Once I figured out how to stop trying to walk in the suit and just let the suit walk for me, the experience was almost transparent,” he said.
